I let some guy put hot sauce in my asshole for his birthday
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
My walk of shame got a new perspective when I walked into his livingroom and found his roommate fucking some chick on the coffee table.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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