I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
Also, I am ligit concerned that I might compulsively start collecting vibrators like Pokemon.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
If shame burned calories, I'll be back to my birth weight by the end of this weekend.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I mean you're asking high Chelsea. I'd sell myself for a rice crispy
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
A fire alarm is going off in some building, people are running around naked and people are passed out in the MIDDLE of the sidewalk. If they ban parties again, I'm going to be pissed.
Randomize
