I seriously wish I was FB friends with her
I don't remember. Are we still dating?
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
There is tupperware vodka. thats right tupperwares full of vodka. best leftovers ever
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
Sex with him was like teaching a two year old how to work a machine gun
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
I've reached the point in my life where I desire cats more than men
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I'm really hot. went tanning and this cheeseburger shirt like isn't breathable
Well.. If you trust a test that only costs a dollar, I'm not pregnant
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
CyberMonday=Bulk Condom Shopping For 2018
Randomize
