Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
It's alright she couldn't hear you. Her legs were over her ears
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
I just handed the barista at Starbucks a panty liner instead of my card....maybe I should upgrade this Tall to a Venti...
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
I had sex with a Dutch boy on a rock last night. Happy graduation! x x
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Randomize
