dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
All she does is lay in bed and watch golden girls and masturbate all day...
It's inspiring.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
This guy has a theme song for the joints he rolls
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
FINE. BE CELIBATE AND ACCUMULATE CATS. SEE IF I CARE.
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
Randomize
