I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
I dunno... she just cried a lot and I kept sighing.
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
I just had someone call me out on a walk of shame via megaphone
I think any school that has COCKS written on it's baseball hats has their priorities straight.
homeboy just tried to sext with me at 8:30 in the morning while I was on a job interview...
so you did it...
obv...but still...it was inconsiderate.
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
I told him I was engaged, had 911 on speed dial and made him wear his seatbelt, then dropped his drunk ass off at his motel...probably not the night he was expecting.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
Randomize
