maybe we dont have boyfriends because we dont have tans
I only gave you my number because I thought fat people were jolly
I too understand the importance of cheesy bread
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
My one night stand found me at the library and randomly gave me plan B. He was scared I was going to get pregnant because he has a very high sperm count.
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Repeat the weekend mantra. "I like boys with teeth, I need boys with teeth, I deserve boys with teeth, I will have boys with teeth".
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Randomize