Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Its really not funny anymore. I need to stop shaving while i'm drunk
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
dude you cant keep breaking into my house just to raid my fridge.. especially at 3AM.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
So he might be the smartest man alive. He had the stripper pick him up taco bell on the way to the room for an extra 50 bucks.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
I am naked, and drinking straight gin with a flat tonic chaser. I had such greater hopes for myself as a child.
yea...tonic water is fucking gross.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize