3:38a: you guys up to anything right now?
i woke up in his bed, he had my shirt on
and high school musical 3 was playing on his lap top
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
He is now the second fuck buddy that i have met by walking up and grinding on him. My ass is so much more productive than dating
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
At least you have booty calls.
True. I just waste them though. I feel like I need to be told "there are people in this world who would give anything for just one and you have two." You know in that same tone your parents told you about the starving people in china
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
Btw I have come to the conclusion that we really need to do it in a bed. Like at least once..
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
We're hate flirting, damnit.
Randomize
