found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Banned from zoo.
Again?
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
no. i just ate a whole thing of hot dogs. me and regret are sleepng alone tonigh.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
Of the three people getting wasted at this dance competition, im two of them
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Easter was a success. We had an egg hunt and hid weed and conforms inside them. Cooked a ham, made some jello, got wasted. THIS is adulthood?!
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
Obviously you're feeling a little sexually frustrated.
I consider humping a stranger every ten minutes when I walk in the street.
Randomize
