At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
He had rug burn on his nose from my landing strip
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
they wouldnt let me drive the convertible because i was in a bird suit :(
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
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