ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
Stop. You don't mean that. Tequila might mean that. But you don't mean that.
I love having hate sex.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
I'm shotgunning a 12 pack at a bus stop. This is why we pay the rent with an auto withdrawal at the beginning of the month
I'm pretty sure I just smoked a chunk of cat food. Thought it was something else. No reply needed.
I was so horny last night, I failed to let him know about my current bed bug infestation.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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