I bet he comes in French.
You know you have a problem when the only thing that saves you is that you drank so late into the night that you sleep through the designated walk of shame time window
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
Get in the lobby, you have to sign my boxers
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
Everyone is slow dancing to Aerosmith. I am serenading a slice of pizza.
Nope. Too hot. We just sat in my tub with cold water spraying on us drinking coronas. This summer heat is killing my libido slowly
Now I'm obligated to stay and cuddle with her because the condom broke. Fuck.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
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