get your tongue out of his mouth and answer your phone. if your not doing more than making out i'm gonna be so pissed. i'm about to sleep in your car bitch
I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Leaving the phone at home last night was the best decision I ever made.... Though I still managed to text her and now I have 2 phones...
you were leaning up against the wall pulling your shirt up asking girls to dance on you. your courage to do that is both admirable and frightening.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
I am sure I don't wanna know but I have to ask... Why is there a kiddie pool full of jello in the living room?
I just interrupted this girl giving a dude head in a parked car on the south side. Going down on your guy while you're parked in front of your house because you don't want your parents catching you is fine by me, just don't block the fire hydrant.
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