Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
One last question would your parents let me sleep in your bathtub for the night?
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
Question: what's the protocol for seeing your mistress walking alongside her clueless boyfriend? If you could answer this ten minutes ago, that'd be great.
I got into a fight with the dude who fell asleep on my couch bc he wouldn't wake up but managed to get a lunch date set for thurs with another guy by the time he finally left. So how's your day so far?
Even his sexts are poetic. He said breasts instead of tits so I'm gonna lock this shit down asap
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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