i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
the party has pretty much ended, it's just 20ish of us jumping and grinding to music from some guy's phone in the corner.
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
you should be awarded for your promiscuity.
i really should.
The narcoleptic neighbor conked out while taking her dog out again. Drinking game based on what the dog does and how long she's out. You in?
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
You pissed off the back deck while listening to the national anthem from your phone screaming America Fuck Yea to my neighbors
You can't say "my boobs are wonderful" and not expect my drunken subconscious to focus on wanting to see them. Btw-can I see them?
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Bra is off & I'm snuggled in a pizza. Adulting is good.
Randomize
