thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
How the fuck did you go into work today? You are a better man than I. I couldn't even show up to being unemployed on time.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
she broke up with me and one of her excuses was constant soreness... should I be sad or proud?
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
The number of people who end up getting laid as a result of the cha cha slide....is terrible.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
His dick is so big it could be an arm rest.
I have to shave my legs first. I'm afraid tiny woodland creatures will fly out if he tries touches them.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
What do you mean relationship? He paid for my tires and I gave him a blow job.
Peru was great. He sent me a text after thanking me for my amazing morals which confused me but made me oddly proud...then he texted a correction. He meant my amazing oral. Sadly this Made me prouder. Fuck u bitches and ur morally inhibiting gag reflexes.
Randomize
