How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Is it wrong to beat off to a girl to determine if you like her or not?
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
I am unfriending an ex-one night stand because his profile picture is of his wife's ultrasound.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
Bro I am trying to have one night stands nothing more, unless she is baking waffles I can eat out of her butthole I am not interested
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
I could fuck to npr.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I did stay at work til 5 but for the last hour I was just taking naked pics on my desk for some tinder guy
Randomize
