I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
im letting my talent of no gag reflex go to waste
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
Currently getting "blaow" buzzed into my pubes. How's your thursday?
I am a 5'4" ball of sexual frustration and vodka. It is that kind of night.
you know, i'm always afraid you're going to think i only want you for sex because i only text you when i'm horny
speaking of, guess what i'm thinking about
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Randomize
