im so drunk with asians
where?
always
There isn't a single transaction on my online bank account that doesn't involve drugs or alcohol since November 12
You don't know the meaning of what the fuck until you wake up naked and alone in someone's bed staring at a dead squirrel on their dresser.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
apparently they wrote a song entitled "butt slut" about her... im thinking shes not girlfriend material.
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
How did "just two beers for happy hour" turn into naked backyard wrestling?
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
I WANNA... wait, will you kinkshame me?
Nah.
I WANNA KNOW WHAT HE SMELLS LIKE
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