Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
I just remember thinking, if she falls asleep, I'm totally eating that spilled chex mix right off of her.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
Well pretty sure I lost 3 of my best friends in one week. Remember when I said I wasn't sure if I was gonna be a better person or a more despicable one in 2012. Despicable wins.
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
He looks like he'd be great Lego character.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
They said you bought the guy a shot and was talking about being Greek and then all of the sudden just puked all in their pitcher of beer and got kicked out of the bar.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
literally took my pants off in the middle of bourbon last night without taking off my heels im a super human i guess
ugh i want to get waxed but I’m afraid. my vagina has had enough trauma this week, i don’t know if I can put her thru any more.
Randomize
