Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
just saw a guy try to order booze in his coffee at 8 am.
So we sucessfully lit our bathtub on fire. Thought you should know.
I wish that vaginas would just grow when you're ready for sex. Like when you dont need your vagina its not there, but when you need it...BAM its there. then no one would see it when you get drunk
yeah...or you could just stop doing cartwheels in skirts
Beach body diet is off. Pizza hut worked its way back onto my google chrome top 8
That sucks. I just talked to a telemarketer for 15 minutes about CSI: Miami and weed.
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
I may have made out with a tranny last night, which, if I don't get fired for everything else that happened, really makes last night epic.
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
I feel like a bottle of fireball rented a bull dozer and ran me over until I was left without a shred of my dignity
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
Randomize