What is this red stuff in a water bottle in my fridge that's labeled "not for baby turtles"?
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
she just made some guy spank her... then made some chick take a running start and spank her.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
Randomize
