He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
Random question, how's your gag reflex these days
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
maddie and i have invented a community puke bowl. explanation later
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Welp, dad and I drunkenly sang Christmas carols until the police told us to stop. I vote Xmas eve a success
You might be at the point of severe desperation when you gotta hold the two pieces of your broken vibrator together just to get off.
I just got hit with cramps and found a mystery pill. I'm gonna stay put for an hour and at least see what happens.
I wanted to waterboard myself with beer, but no one would give me their shirt to do it.
It’s so white trash that I almost have to have it.
Randomize
