Grow some girl-balls and come out already
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
This guy knew what he was doing. Most guys can't find the spot even if it shot off a flare and played a kazoo.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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