AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
Is it penis luge time yet?
I am now best friends with a lesbian named Zulu. I am pretty hammered already and made a game time decision to stay here another night,for partying purposes
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
My parents woke me up at noon to tell me my maid had found my clothes strewn all over the neighborhood
Fucked her on the patio while some dude drove by on a mower. He waved. Twice.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
Tell her that we understand the angle wasn't the best on the first video and that we forgive her.
Randomize
