I'm waiting for seagulls to eat this throw up
Youll never guess who has to go to fucking planned parenthood because trojan cant make a fucking condom
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Not sure if this is better or worse than the discovery that bourbon and hot chocolate is a viable combo
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
It's like someone is grabbing my scrodum with pliers and just hanging there.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I would say "man cannot subsist on sexting and brownies alone" but I think it's actually possible.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
We are horrible
Yeah but we're also awesome
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Randomize
