oh good, I think they're gone
the painters?
my herpes
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
ok watching intervention on tv. when i hit rock bottom - i wanna be THIS chick.
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
At what part of the night did you guys leave?
After my hot tub cannonball.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Auto correct isn't even working for how drunk you are
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
there's fucking coffee grinds packed all inside my pipe. what did i do
Randomize
