I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
zippers are such a cool invention
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
My eyes got the double whammy. Once with pepperspray from the riot the other with cum. Both of which i did nothing to deserve.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I was blowdrying my hair this morning and I swear to god it smelled like franzia
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
He autographed my vag. This fuck just got authentic.
Low key that was incredibly dangerous to let me wield a sword at this point in the night
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
woke up to my little sister's best-friend's boyfriend in my bed, but how's your saturday going?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
