Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
she pooed on me. she actually pooed on me.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Pretty sure I saw a dude across the room give this girl the international hand gesture for "I'm going to fist you later", she seemed ok with it.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
My boyfriend woke me up in the middle of the night to have sex with me right before I had sex with another guy in my dream. What a unique sixth sense his penis has.
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
You thought that you were playing full contact and started screaming "I will fucking end you! I will end you!" and tried tackling everyone in the room.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
is it too soon to tell him I'm available anytime for Christmas themed pity sex and I'll even wear a Santa hat?
No one wanted to hang out so vodka and I are hanging out
Literally the fucking master of salvaging the possibility of a blow job whilst also crushing somebody's dreams.
I'm hosting my annual valentine's day party tomorrow with every hookup I've ever had. thoughts on how it will turn out ??
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
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