You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
There comes a time where you just have to sit back and watch the drunken idiots pee on each other
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I gotta shower this stuff off me I'm starting to hear baby kittens in the toilet tank again..
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
You know that you're in a bad spot when the doctor puts you on 500mg of amoxicillin 4 times a day for ten days and puts refills on it...
I'm the catering manager, it's not my job to stop 2 teenagers from fucking in the bathroom. I couldn't bring myself to stop that sort of young romance anyway, that's what I pay you people for
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Fine I'll cuddle you but only for the purpose of trying to survive
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