just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
he just had his sister send me a message about how he's not a creeper
Was his mother too busy breastfeeding him to do it?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
just saw way to many penises for it being 5 o'clock on a thursday
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
i'm licking honey sensually off my arm while alone in my room. what has my life come to
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Randomize
