Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Goose bottles do NOT make good bowling pins
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Well, McDonalds 'escorted' me out after I passed out mid-order
I'm okay.. I had a good heart to heart with the cab driver Raheem - it's going to be our year.
Remember me drinking the vodka from in between your legs?
The next time i black out make sure i remove the ping pong balls from my weave. Especially before my first day of classes.
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
Crazy homeless man drinking beer out of a vitamin water container on the bus just set me up on a date with the yuppie next to him
Randomize
