...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
I managed to fit my wallet, my keys, my phone, Tammy's necklace, and $38.50 all in my bra. and $1.50 is in quarters. go me.
If your wondering where your blanket is, I put it on the 2 guys you brought home last night. Their still sleeping outside on the trampoline.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
My bed smells like stale sex...I want it to smell like fresh sex, I miss you.
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
And if it ever comes down to tax or healthcare benefits we can get married
That's the sweetest thing I've ever heard
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
