Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
I just sneezed everywhere.....everywhere. Now no one will talk to me.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I just saw a van full of amish parents and their kids. Those cheating mother fuckers!
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
I do not want to do anything. The words more tequila need to be erased from my vocabulary
At one point I went looking for you and found you handcuffed to a chair. I'm pretty sure you handcuffed yourself. I don't know how you got there.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
He's a loser but she says we just don't see the good stuff about him. It's like she's dating the Charlie Brown Christmas Tree.
just got permission to expense a nerf gun
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Pretty sure I just got the ok to have a one night stand in Maui...from mom. I'd say that's a win in my book.
I'd give my right arm to start my period. My right arm. Thats more significant then my left.
Randomize
