You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
He is the one I "technically" lost my virginity to.
I feel like you never had a virginity..
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I'm impressed you managed to decipher 'annslqllpprebBcncnj' into 'I'm drunk at the Vic, come pick me up and do me on the kitchen table'
what kind of roommate is she really? she wouldn't even hold my hair back.
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
I'm sorry. I just realized our 'big night out' ended up being you driving my high ass to get burritos and back.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
His dick is a spiritual experience and meditation is very important to me.
I never thought I'd be complaining about having sex 4 times a day, but here we are...
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