Moan for me like Helen Keller
went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Working out to an exercise video on OnDemand. Also, drinking beer and eating cream cheese with a side of bagel in between stretches.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
Randomize
