Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
I woke up at 4 am. Literally pissed. No idea what happened. I could have fucked a cow.
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I almost rear ended this hot guy driving a Porsche Cayenne just so I could get his phone number
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
