I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
the teacher just ate a hash brownie and passed out on the bus best field trip 2010'
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
My judgement was not "clouded". My judgement was in the midst of a fucking hurricane or something ridiculous.
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
Somehow ed fucked carrie while purposely not saying a single word to her all night. He just nodded and smiled.
Would it have been easier if he talked to her?
Yeah, but i bet him he couldn't do it. Now he gets a free taco bell combo of his choosing.
I sat on the toilet and peed through my jeans, then I pissed the bed and blamed him...do you think well have a 2nd date?
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
With great liquor, comes great irresponsibility. Remind me of this night tomorrow.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
pray to the hookup gods
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