Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
Apparently, banging my bartender ex-girlfriend = free drinks again. Not every bad decision is a wrong decision.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I just woke up and my mouth tastes like I licked the bathroom floor in the last ghetto bar we were in. I'm going to get my mouth checked for chlamydia. Do I see a dentist for that?
He would have to make magical things happen in my nether regions to actually make me vote republican.
He got up when I started trying to balance my wine glass on his head.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
I don't like sad things. I do like drinking though
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
There was nowhere else for me to go. I'm like the island of misfit toys but I'm hot.
are you listening to the theme from Jurassic Park whilst pooping?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
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