Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
After last night, I could never be a politician.
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
Best part of being a cop: When I showed up at Thanksgiving with stitches in my head I could tell them I was "protecting and serving" not "drinking and falling down". Career validated.
he kept saying that we were in ian's fun time place and then continued to act like a dinosaur.
I can only take thier stupid "I think beauty school is for me" routine so long until I have to bitch slap them with some knowledge
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
He said, "cum on daddy's dick!" ... I pictured my dad. That just scarred me for life.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
Have you ever gotten so angry that you stripped in public?
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
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