So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
I just put out an orange level terrorist threat on her punani
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i will never coherently bang her
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Man now I have poo on my blackberry!!!
brownberry?
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I came so hard my entire leg seized. Her blowjob gave me a Charlie horse.
You tried to chase every shot with a blueberry.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize