Do they make some cleansing product for your soul? Like mouthwash that makes you not a skank? Or is that what religions for?
Eh, i think it's called sobriety. But its not fun.
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
I'm drunk in a place called Lick-A-Chick. PS. It's not a lesbian hot spot, they sell chicken.
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
He was gone when I woke up. But he left skid marks on my sheets and our unopened bottle of Titos is missing
New Rule: No more sleepovers with guys we met on Reddit
RICK FUCKING MORANIS!!!!!
Randomize
