Yeah i mean there's 3 guys fighting over me. It would just be bitchy of me not to get with at least 1.
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
just once i'd like the "right thing" and the "topless thing" to be the SAME THING
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I saw him walking to campus with his beer in his hand in the same sweats he wore walking to campus with a beer in his hand yesterday.
You're just mad that I don't wanna have dugout sex with you
I came back to consciousness and found myself sitting in a beanbag chair petting a 2 month old husky with one hand and eating an oreo Klondike bar with the other. This almost makes me forgive blackout lisa for making out with that chubbs at the xmas party
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
At the very least, I mastered a nap while occasionally being dry humped.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
Would seriously like to slash his tires but then I feel like I'd have to deal with him longer.
Randomize
