3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
I'm at the casino and some dude apparently has money in an entire row of slot machines. Its like watching a really intense adult version of wack a mole
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I'm currently blowing up the downstairs bathroom at work. I wish I could foursquare this.
My goal for tonight: make tomorrow as awkward as humanly possible.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Let's get the cat blown out
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
seriously considering getting an electric blanket rather than sleeping with guys this winter for warmth.
I wonder if go pro can customize a cock ring so I don't have to hold the camera anymore
If all that ever happens between us is orgasms and dank memes, I think I'd be okay with that.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Randomize