I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
I'm starting to question if I'm gonna need to bring a raincoat just to drink around u
U act like I can cum on command
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Pray for me. I just had a sex dream about Debbie Wasserman-Schultz.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
Randomize
