This girl is more easily done than said...
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I mean I'm so obviously classy currently laying in bed watching a movie while finishing my drink from last night
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
the staff put glowsticks in the urinals of the porta-pottys last night and honestly drunk me has never been more grateful for anything in his life
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Randomize
