WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
what's the appropriate greeting for someone whose bed you've had sex with someone else in?
I replaced his Viagra pills with sleeping pills.
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
i feel like doing his laundry was not included in the job description when we became fuck buddies.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Mom wants to know if you're coming over or if it's safe for her to take her bra off...
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