In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
He told me he had an exgf. and didnt follow up with"and now i like guys."
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
He could list all of the presidents! Every one, and in order!! I was so impressed the least I could do was give him a blow job.
Ah, yes. Making our founding fathers proud.
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
Pissing in la rieve gfox. Jer zsyuis diu drunk but it felt amazunbg
Dans le librearie ivetre. Hjhaha
I guarantee that wasn't the first penis someone placed on her forehead.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
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