I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
Omg. Get me out of here. Someone is playing michelle branch.
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
everyday i am more and more thankful i can still check the no box for "have you ever been convicted of a felony?" on applications
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Boobs speak an international language.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
In my defense, who let the drunk girl run around with a sack of broken glass unsupervise?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
WHY THE FUCK DOES RICKY'S BROTHER GET AN ENTIRE POT OF PASTA FOR BEING SHIRTLESS AND ALL I GET IS ARRESTED?!
Randomize
